Review – Star Trek Attack Wing – USS Enterprise B

ent-b
Silver?  Really?  Ugh! 

I haven’t written about Star Trek Attack Wing in a while – and with good reason.  Re-releases of existing models with new paint just doesn’t excite me.  I buy miniatures to play, not to collect.  Ever hopeful to have all of the starships named Enterprise, I had to pick up the Enterprise B

First – the mini.  It is silver.  Literally dipped in silver with two spots of red on the impulse engines, some black stripes on the nancelles, and some blue on the warp drive and deflector dish.  I could have painted this mini in less than two minutes, and most of that would have been me searching for my paints.  This mini reflects light it is so shiny. 

The NX class ships were silverish WizKids, but that ended there. What the hell?  Was your factory out of florescent orange or purple? Was there some sort of sale on silver paint?   To be kind, the paint job on the Enterprise B sucks dead lizard-ass.  You get the impression here that Wizkids is deliberately flipping off its customers when they release product like this.  It is a massive disappointment of Chinese molded plastic and likely lead-based paints put on by forced child-labor.  You can almost smell the painter’s tears of shame and sadness on this model.  Sniff. 

I calmed myself momentarily.  “Chill Blaine.  Be cool.  There are bound to be some good cards here.  I mean we can get another Captain Kirk or Scotty.  They were in Generations.   Maybe there will be an enchanced transporters card or a rescue card of some sort. It will be okay dude – just relax.” 

Fuc* a duck.  Even as I type this I pause and do a face plant.  Some cards are useful  Deflector Control – the ability to repair a shield is always welcome. Demora Sulu gives you an extra emergency move – which could be a lifesaver.  The improved phasers seem good – but with the timer…I wonder if they are even worth the points.  Resonance Burst is good but only has a range of one.  This could be something useful if it had longer range – mostly for decloaking enemy ships.  At a range of one, why bother. 

There’s a holo-communicator that lets you “borrow” another Captain’s skills within a range of 1-2.  That could be good for fleet engagements though frankly, this card seems to be just tossed in – we never saw this on the Enterprise B in Star Trek Generations.  Could you at least pick cards that have some relationship to the starship?  Apparently I’m asking too much.

Beating a dead horse, the cards that show the ship show it as white – not silver.

Captain Harriman is rated a two (which seems a tad high based on the film) and gets a free action.  His card barely warrants a yawn. 

No Kirk, Scotty, or Checkov cards.  Another wasted opportunity on the part of Wizkids.

While I await the Enterprise C miniature, I found this release of the B to be lacking.  I get the feeling Wizkids isn’t even trying any more.   Here’s a tip for not inciting your fans:  Don’t slap a sticker commemorating the 50th anniversary of Star Trek and put out a crappy product.   I give the Enterprise B a whopping one star.  

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4 thoughts on “Review – Star Trek Attack Wing – USS Enterprise B

  1. R. Anderson

    In fairness, the Improved Phasers is meant to be stacked with Type 8 Phaser Array from the USS Hood, or Upgraded Phasers from the USS Lakota; preferably both. Using both requires the Arsenal upgrade from the USS Phoenix — which allows the Improved Phasers to fire every turn.

  2. Ben Parker

    What sucks even worse is that the 1701-B is an Excelsior Class upgrade with two engine pods off the back of the saucer, and some fins down on the secondary hull. Look at the card. Look at the mini. I’m glad I picked up a used micro machine one from a friend. The bad saucer section alone has my distaste.

    I really don’t want to have to resort to the AMT/ Round 2 1/2500 ships because of the potential collision issues, but it scratches the aesthetic and scale itch.

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